Inspired By: Bethany Sy of Reality Daydream

Tackling a huge home improvement project can be stressful under the best circumstances. Tackling a huge home improvement project on a whim — with virtually no DIY experience under your toolbelt — is not for the faint of heart. And yet, designer Bethany Sy has done just that… twice in fact.

Adventures in Blogging

As a newlywed in 2009, Bethany fell in love with an old farmhouse that she and husband Nick had passed on a Sunday drive through the Iowa countryside. Bethany recalled, “we came up over a hill and saw a glorious, perfect farmhouse sitting on several acres of grass and shade trees. I caught my breath and said aloud, ‘I want that house!’.”

Moments after voicing her wish, Bethany noticed a For Sale sign in the front yard. The couple put in an offer, and after some stressful negotiations, they were the proud owners of a turn-of-the-century farmhouse on five green acres. 

Days after moving in, Bethany began updating the interior, and started a blog to document the progress. For the next nine years, visitors to realitydaydream.com were served up a down-home blend of humor and encouragement as they learned how to stencil walls, install crown moulding, and grout a mosaic backsplash. Readers also followed Nick and Bethany’s struggle with infertility and shared the couple’s joy as they welcomed three daughters into their family — a victory that Bethany calls their, “most important DIY project ever.”

Renovating a Mansion

Bethany and Nick had planned to make the farmhouse their forever home, until a realtor friend emailed a must-see listing. The enormous five-bedroom, 2.5 bath, historic home came with a tiny price tag ($104,000) that the Sy family just couldn’t pass up. By the spring of 2019, the family had a new address and Bethany was blogging about fresh projects in the stately 1932 Colonial/Federal house. 

Starting at the grand foyer with its curved staircase, every room of the house holds charming architectural details — from built-in cabinets and bookcases, to intricately detailed corbels and crown mouldings.

Bethany said she, “loved every square inch of it… except for the kitchen.” For such a huge home, the kitchen was remarkably small, and seemed almost like an afterthought that had been tacked onto the back of the house. Bethany had a vision for something much larger, and much more functional, for her family of five.

The old kitchen was ripped off the back of the house, the backyard was excavated, and what would become a nine-month adventure in home improvement began. Creating a kitchen from scratch means multiple projects with many moving parts and lots of purchases to make. To simplify the process, Bethany turned to Build.com.

“We loved shopping at Build.com. It made it so easy to shop for so many features of our kitchen in one place!” -Bethany Sy, Reality Daydream

We asked Bethany what she learned while renovating two houses, and to share her best tips and insights for taking on home improvement projects. Here’s what she told us:

Q & A with Bethany Sy of Reality Daydream

Lessons Learned from the Farmhouse Project 

Q: What lessons did you learn during the farmhouse renovation that you were able to bring to this project? 

A: Honestly, it was in that first house that we learned that each other was handy and creative. We were newlyweds and first-time homeowners, and pleasantly surprised each other with creativity and work ethic!

Q: Were there specific lessons you learned from the farmhouse reno related to working on historic homes? 

A: The farmhouse was actually built before our existing home, so we learned a lot about old homes: to have a realistic expectation on timing, and that sometimes projects have to be done in a certain order

Q: Are there certain quirks or eccentricities with older homes that DIYers should keep in mind? 

A: Expect the unexpected and have an open mind.

The Mansion Renovation 

Q: The home has so many stunning original details. How do you balance preserving the character of the house while designing a functional home for a modern family? 

A: This is a delicate balancing act. We definitely try to honor the history of the home at every turn. And for the most part, it’s easy… because we love the character and moulding. But it’s also our home, and if there’s something that really bothers us, we change it without looking back.

Q: How did you decide which projects to tackle yourselves, versus hiring a contractor? 

A: We try to do as much as we can ourselves to save money (and because we enjoy it!), but if a job seems outside of our skill set or too daunting to tackle on our own, we call for reinforcement.

Pro Tips for Surviving a Kitchen Remodel

Q: You lived without a kitchen for nine months. What was the biggest challenge to a long reno process? 

A: Being without a kitchen was by far the biggest challenge. Otherwise we don’t mind living in a renovation at all! Although, when the children were little, there were hazards involved that made things difficult. And drywall dust makes everything more inconvenient.

Q: What was the biggest challenge for living so long without a kitchen? 

A: Well, it was no easy task — especially when you have littles to feed. We had no idea it would take nine months. The hardest part was doing dishes. Since I found creative ways to make all our normal meals, there were all the same pots, pans and mixing bowls after each meal as when we had a kitchen. So we decided to use actual dishes to eat on as well, rather than using so many paper products and creating a ton of waste.

“Expect the unexpected and have an open mind.” - Bethany on Home Improvement

We used a utility sink that wasn’t hooked up to a water source. We would take a 5-gallon bucket upstairs to the bathtub and fill it with soapy water, and bring it down to fill the sink. Then we had another 5-gallon bucket filled with non-soapy water for rinsing. Our whole family would be in an assembly line washing, rinsing, drying, and putting away. It was always quite a production (and not anyone’s favorite thing), but I think we all have lots of good memories from this time together as a family.

Q: What do you wish you had known before you started? 

A: I would tell someone to plan on every single thing going wrong at every turn. And don’t expect contractors to be reliable or do what they say they're going to do. 

Q: Any tips for surviving a reno with young kids in the house? 

A: Our kids are real champs and don’t even bat an eye at constant renovation noises or mess. They’ve grown up in this environment and are very chill about everything. The hardest part is that they want to ‘help’ with all the things. Of course we love that they have this desire, and we love teaching them. But it can really slow down the momentum of a project.

The Creative Process 

Q: You designed the kitchen. What was your process and where did you find your inspiration? 

A: This part was really hard for me. I’m usually a design-as-I-go kind of girl, so making all the decisions in advance was very difficult. We really made a lot of the bigger decisions together (the cabinets/finishes, flooring, etc), and then I would make mood boards with the elements we had chosen and would add in details, like lighting, hardware, etc.

Q: You said in your walkthrough video that you plan to transform the solarium into a “space for creating.” Please talk about what creative expression means to you, how you exercise that in your home renovation projects, and the importance of giving your girls a space to create. 

A: Our kids are naturally creative, since they’re around it all the time. We want to encourage their creativity, and it was important to us to have a space dedicated to that! We give the kids a lot of free reign with supplies and tools, and we’re always impressed with the things they make.

Q: Can you share your favorite design tips for creating beautiful, comfortable spaces? What are some designer secrets that even a DIYer can implement in their home? 

A: Your home should reflect your style, so embrace that and don’t apologize! If you’re stuck on where to start in a room, find a key element that you love —  a rug, curtains, a piece of art — and take the color scheme and style from that piece to help you with inspiration for the rest of the room!

Love, Marriage, and Home Improvement 

Q: What is your design and home improvement background? Are you or Nick formally trained in either, or did you figure it out as you went along? 

A: I was studying Interior Design at ISU (Iowa State University) when NIck and I met. I didn’t graduate because his job took us to another city, but my love for interior design remained. Nick grew up learning things like electrical, plumbing, and framing from his dad, and spent a summer framing houses before we met. But he’s not afraid to tackle something he’s never done, and always does a lot of research before starting a project.

Q: Any tips for working on a project with your partner? 

A: We certainly have our spats, but we do enjoy working together for the most part. The key for us is to respect each other’s opinions, and compromise when necessary. Sometimes tensions get high, and when that happens, we take a breather and work on separate projects for a time if we need to.

Q: What unique skills/qualities do each of you bring to the work? 

A: Nick is the perfectionist of the two of us, and I’m the free-spirit. We definitely balance each other out in that way. But it can also cause a lot of conflict. In general though, he does more of the technical projects (electrical, plumbing, framing, etc), and I do painting, caulking, sewing, and smaller woodworking projects.

Working With Build.com 

At Build.com, our goal is to provide the best selection in every home improvement category, as well as the best customer experience - including access to friendly, knowledgeable product experts. 

Q: What was it like to shop at Build.com? 

A: Shopping at Build.com was so convenient and pleasant. We love the products and styles, and it was wonderful to have so many different elements available on one site. And, the customer service was excellent, and everyone that we interacted with was very pleasant and helpful!

Q: Were you able to find unique, on-trend products in the styles and finishes to complement your project? 

A: YES! Build.com has so many different styles and designs, there’s something for everyone!

About Reality Daydream 

Nick and Bethany Sy are the creative free-spirits behind DIY/Lifestyle blog, Reality Daydream. They recently purchased a historic mansion and have been documenting the ups and downs of renovation and making this home their own... all while sharing tips and tutorials along the way! When they found themselves in the trenches of infertility, they started a journey that would prove to be their most important DIY project ever, and have 3 beautiful girls to show for it.

Follow their adventures on the Reality Daydream website, Facebook @RealityDaydream, Instagram @RealityDaydream, and Pinterest @RealityDaydream